It's Always McGee
by bubblebummm
Summary: Tony reflects. Abby/McGee, Tony/Abby.


Hey all! I know I should be updating my other story. But I feel the need to warm up the creative flow in my mind (oh yeah, that was mad). Technically, I am a McGee/Abby fan but I had this idea about ten minutes ago and thought I may as well give it a go. This is just a short one shot that I wrote over a couple of days. So, on we go!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own NCIS or any related characters. Or Kaf Pow (is that made up for the show? I dunno!)

**It's always McGee**

**[1] abby**

It's always McGee isn't it? Always the one she runs to for help, always the one she praises, always the one she works best with. And it kills me. I have to admit it, even only to myself. For the first time in my life, I am jealous of McGee, I want to be him. I know I outshine him in many areas, the wit, the charm, the athleticism, the humour, the ladies, the looks... I could go on, but this isn't about me, this is about her. Abby.

**[2] green eyed monster**

It's always McGee. I can see in the end they'll end up together. Everyone knows it, the hugs, the flirtation, and the jokes. It's obvious; to everyone but them. You hear everyone around the office talking about it, wondering what they get up to in the hours they spend down in the forensics labs. When they ask my opinion I smile, laugh and refer to some movie about nerds getting the girl. They laugh and the guys slap me on the back. "Good one DiNozzo," they'll say. Or, "I know what you mean." And I walk on. Because that's how they know me; Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, the funny, charming one capable of no real feelings towards women. What they don't know is that I use my jokes and quick wit to cover up the fact that there's a burning deep down, and a strain in my chest. A burning filed with anger and an envy that sears my throat as it creeps up and threatens to spill out with every step and quick, calming breath I take.

**[3] Kaf Pow is a powerful thing**

It's always McGee. Whenever I go down to the lab with a Kaf Pow in my hand and I see him; handing her one, her smile lighting up and jumping into his arms with a hug. And I turn on my heel and walk back to the elevator, passing Gibbs along the way. And he gives me a knowing smile and pats me on the back. Of course Gibbs would know. He's the only one who pays so much attention to his team. Sees the shine in my eyes whenever her name is mentioned, or they way I act even more like a jerk to McGee whenever she's with him. And before stepping into the elevator I throw the damned coffee drink into the bin; it needs to be shoved in from all the other Kaf Pows I've thrown in there.

**[4] just like in the movies**

It's always McGee. I see her running towards me, her black piggy tails bouncing, and a look of jubilation on her face. I smile and start to hold out arms to catch her, but she runs past me. I turn and hear her squeal, "Yes Timmy, yes!" She jumps into McGee's arms. She's holding a note in her hand, and as I walk away I hear her say, "That was the sweetest thing I've ever heard!" I keep walking, my breathing shallow as I clench my fists. I walk into the morgue and as Ducky starts rambling about medieval knights, or it might be the many mistakes of Julius Caesar, I slide down the wall and hold my head in my hands. I missed my chance. And for the first time in a long time, I feel tears fall down my face, something that didn't even happen when Kate died. I blocked it all out.

**[5] jitters**

It's always McGee. So therefore I'm an idiot, why am I doing this to myself? I'm in the elevator to the labs, Abby had called me, and she wants to see me. It's her and McGee's one year anniversary tonight. I walk through the door and she's facing the wall, her hair in an elegant twist at the nape of her neck. She has a knee length royal blue dress on, her skin is glowing. She turns around and says, "Zip me up me Tony?" I walk over to her, mentally scolding myself, _stupid, stupid, stupid. _My hands are shaking, and the lump in my throat is rising as I move the zipper up, and sweep one loose strand of hair over her shoulders. She turns to me and smiles, "You know what Tony? I trust you, because I know you'll always be there for me. And I love you; you're the brother I never had." She turns and hugs me, and with that the last thread holding together my heart breaks.

**[6] advice**

It's always McGee. I walk back to my desk and I see McGee pacing and mumbling to myself, I put my hand on his shoulder and he jumps "And she doesn't think you're crazy yet. Amazing McPshyc." He turns and mumbles, "Sorry, I'm nervous Tony." What? I think I know where this is going. I jump on the desk and smile playfully.

"What, that she'll finally tell you that she prefers women to you. Actually that'd be pretty hot. Make sure you ask for a photo of her secret girlfriend. A video perhaps?" I joke.

"Shut it Tony. I'm not messing around. I'm doing it. Asking her to marry me."

And my already broken heart is tugged at, stretched at the sides; an agonising tear rips through my chest. I pick up my bag, calm my face and turn around.

"Good luck McGee." I slap him on the back and go into the elevator; I can see him pacing once again. It's over. No chance now. I snort, _you think DiNozzo?_

**[7] all dressed in white**

It's always McGee. Standing at the altar, smiling to his friends, and he turns his head and his face go suddenly still. And I'm sitting in the church. I shouldn't have come, but there would have been awkward questions going around the office. And everyone starts standing up, so I follow their lead. A sea of heads turns around in unison. And there she is; a glowing radiant beauty, dressed in a simple white dress with lace added here and there. I couldn't describe the dress as amazing, compared to the girl wearing it. Her hair in pin-curls, a simple diamond clip and the perfect skin, the smile on her face, growing wider when she sees him, and the elegant gloves on her arms, now crooked around the elbow, joined with Gibbs. The father she always wanted. We sit. The vows are said, the rings exchanged, my heart gets ripped from my chest, and they kiss. Man and wife, forever bound.

...

It's always McGee.


End file.
